Costs & Misconceptions

$25,150. That's the estimated cost for our adoption. We had slightly underestimated the cost of adoption. When we first explored a few agencies and were made aware of the associated costs, we were blown away. So, I am assuming some of you may feel the same. This fee schedule, provided by our agency will help you to understand why we need to raise $25,150 at minimum. Some assume the money is due at the end when you are matched with a birth mom or when you bring your baby home. That is not the case. There are fees due all along the way. So, in order to keep the ball rolling we need to have money raised to pay these fees. These fees go to help the birth mom with a home, counseling, and medical costs. They also pay for our training, home study, interviews, legal fees and tons of other little things necessary to bring home our baby. Here is the list broken down:

Review & processing Fee              $95

Orientation Fee                              $250

Training                                           $255

Application Fee                              $750     

Home Study                                    $1,500   

Social Service Fee 1                       $1,300   

Social Service Fee 2                       $3,500  

Outreach Fee                                  $6,000

Match/Placement Fee                   $10,000

Legal Fees- Finalization               $1,500

Total                                                 $25,150

Raised                                              $4,500

There are some common misconceptions when people first hear of the HIGH cost of adoption. Some are tempted to think its all a big scam or some might think to themselves, "are they BUYING a baby?". NO!! Absolutely not. No doubt some agencies might have their own interest at heart, but we took time and prayerfully evaluated multiple agencies to find a reputable Christian agency that's heart is to place children with "forever families", not to make as much money as possible under the guise of well doing. Some may be fearful to donate or move forward in adoption themselves because the misconception that if the birth mom chooses to be the child's mother (there is a small risk of this happening), we will lose all of the money and lose our opportunity to adopt. Let me set your mind at ease. We have no risk of losing the money. The match placement fee will be refunded to us until we are matched with another birth mom.

This is a difficult topic to discuss but we do so because of the high price paid for our adoption, Jesus' blood, and for the opportunity to extend that to a child in need. We believe Jesus' heart is for adoption, that he has called us to adopt and that his plan to provide has already been written.

Even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will, to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace.

Ephesians 1:4-7

Exciting News!!!

Yesterday was a beautiful day. First, we got to rejoice in hearing 14 beautiful stories of God’s grace in our church family and then watch as they followed Jesus in baptism.  I was even honored to be a part of baptizing a dear friend. Then, when we came home Ryan pulled an envelope out of his pocket to show me what some of our friends had given us. He was aware of my anticipation, so he proceeded to move ridiculously slowly to open it up. Imagine a drum roll…………. and out came a check. He opened it up to show me a check for $2,500!! I, of course, immediately began to cry (tears of joy) and we praised Jesus!

How is it that even though I know of his care and provision and that He has with out a doubt called us to adoption, I still doubt that He will come through? It's not that I don’t think He will eventually, I just wonder how much work it will take and how long it will be. Kind of sounds like I want it on my terms… I annoy myself!!!  Though I desire to, I do not always trust him perfectly. This goes to show you, this has absolutely nothing to do with how good I am. He is so faithful in spite of me.

Our hearts are filled with gratefulness, worship and anticipation.  Romans 8:32 comes to mind, “He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?”

We enjoyed the afternoon doing pre-marital counseling with a couple we love. It's been a blast watching them grow in their relationship as they understand the gospel more deeply. It has been such a blessing to spend time with them and get to know them.

Bringing you up to speed...

Currently we have raised $4,500 all before announcing a single fundraiser. Woot woot!  It's hard to say "we have raised" when God has led hearts to give. It's crazy that I have been so anxious to get a fundraiser going so that we won't get held up in the process, and now God is showing me quite obviously He's got this. Right now we are awaiting our Orientation on October 26-27. At the completion of Orientation, we will finally be able to begin the Application process and Home Study. This looks like loads of paperwork and interviews, background checks and fingerprints, creating a profile for the birth mom, etc. In the next week, we will also be announcing fundraiser plans to raise the remaining $20,000.

We are in such a busy season right now; I could use tons of prayer. Pray that I will continue to trust Him and not become overwhelmed. Pray for God to impress the hearts of some to give toward providing a loving home for a child. Pray for the birth mom’s heart during such an emotionally grievous process. Pray for our sweet baby.

Waiting & Celebrating

After 5 years of trying to conceive, you might think I have gotten good at the waiting game, right? Wrong! Though I have spent so much time waiting, I remain a student in the class of patience. And, each step through this process requires more waiting. Choosing our agency was such an important decision it took us over a month. It was tempting for me to "eni meeni mini mo", just so we could make a decision. I keep trying to hurry things along. I am just so ready to hold our precious baby in my arms, to snuggle, and kiss and enjoy with Ryan. Why does every step take so much time!!?? AHHH!!!! Thankfully, Ryan is so patient with me when I attempt to pressure him and want to take control. I am continually running to Jesus asking for direction and joy and rest and being reminded that His timing is ALWAYS best! 

As God is continuing to teach me patience through this adoption journey, he is revealing to me my need to celebrate.

We are in a season in our church that our pastor has called the Autumn of Awesome; drawn from the desire to celebrate what God is doing more often. Although I don't think Pastor Jim wanted "Autumn of Awesome" to ever be repeated due to its cheesiness, it has made me realize that I usually do a poor job celebrating. My mind easily gets overwhelmed with all the things we need to do, all the money we need to raise, or the stresses of the day instead of reflecting on what He has done.  I am learning how to be thankful in all things. My thanks does not end in the enjoyment of the gifts He has so generously given, but my heart is stirred to worship the Giver of all good things. Because He has given so much, we have a lot to be excited about. Below is our ongoing list of Celebration. I keep it in the note section of my phone, so I can add to it often.

We ...

 • Are ADOPTING!!

 • Have chosen our agency (Christian Homes in Abilene)

 • Have completed our Pre-app and 9 reference forms

 • Have been approved and paid for Orientation October 26-27

 • Have signed up for 8 hour infant child care training course

 • Received gifts of $1500 toward our $25,500 goal

 • Have been gifted a brand new sweet rocking chair 

 • Signed up for our First Aid/CPR course

 • We have a loving and supportive family (biological and church) and friends helping, encouraging and celebrating with us

 I am excited to see how God continues to provide. 

A Child of Our Own

Why adopt when you can have children of your own?

This is one of the many questions we have been asked by friends and family who have known us through out various chapters of our life. This post is dedicated to those of you who are curious about what led us in this direction.

We have tried for almost 5 years now to conceive a child. Outside of fertility treatments, I have tried every natural treatment you could find and endured a couple of surgeries- all to no avail. It has been a painful few years. But it has also been extremely GOOD. Good, only because the one who designed this plan is good and his plan always far outweighs what I could possibly consider being an awesome plan.

Shortly after we first started trying to conceive, thoughts and conversations about adoption began. Ryan has always desired to adopt; in fact, he had a more difficult time understanding my desire to conceive biologically, and why I wanted to so desperately. It made complete since to him that there are thousands of children in need of a family. Why wouldn’t we rescue and provide a loving home for one?

It took my heart much longer to be completely ready (to let go of my “better” plan). I would always say, “Lets try all we can to conceive our own and then we can adopt in the future.” Though adoption has been on our radar all along our journey, God had to remind me yet again that his plan is better. He walked me though a lot of lies that I believed about adoption, about my control/ his control in conception and then through the grieving process of not being able to bare a child before I could totally rest in and rejoice in the plan he had all along. 

There has been numerous times along this road that Jesus has tendered my heart toward adoption. Whether it be through understanding our own adoption into the family of God through Jesus, or through convos with strangers on planes, getting to hold someone else’s baby they had just adopted, or the Holy Spirit stirring my heart, He has continually led my heart toward adoption. Most of the time I would respond in fear that this meant we would never have our own, and then I would hold even more tightly to my expectations. Some how adoption was a less satisfying way to build our family.  I believed that having our own child could only come from our DNA. It just wouldn’t be the same any other way.

Just 2 months ago we were presented with the decision to move forward with IVF. I was certain we would.  We had even given our doctor the consent to begin treatment the next month, but there was still no peace within me. This was our opportunity to finally have our own child. How can it be that I feel so conflicted?! This is something I have waited for years for! An interesting thing had happened. I suddenly felt sad about the child we would not get to meet through adoption. It’s such a beautiful and loving thing what Jesus did. He suddenly made me have infinitely more joy and excitement for my "last resort" than what I had been hoping in for 5 years. Did I say yet, "he is good’?

The question was asked, “Why adopt when you can have your own”? I now understand that children our chosen by God no matter how they make it into our home. Who knows? God may allow us to conceive a child from my womb in the future. But, that child will be no more my own than the child God gifts us through adoption.  He has perfectly picked the child for our family.   

First Things First

First there was a girl who met a boy and they got married! Then they wanted to have a baby...through a long and painful 5 year journey of infertility, boy and girl's hearts were drawn toward adoption by a loving God who has been with them every step of the way and had a much better plan than they ever imagined. Check back often to read about how this loving God is orchestrating a beautiful union and making boy+girl=baby.

Hi, I'm Kaylan, I'm the girl in the story, and I can't wait to share our journey through adoption with you!